Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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