I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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