K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
