I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize