i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
