The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
