Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
