between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
