I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
