so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
