If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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