its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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