based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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