dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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