i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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