Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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