Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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