Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
