i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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