Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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