Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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