Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
