$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
My vagina is very pro this idea
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize