my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
