How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
