Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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