as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
How external is "for external use only"?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He keeps bees of course he's weird
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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