I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
