There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
