I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
