i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize