How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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