He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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