he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
