No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
