literally had 100 drinks last night.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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