Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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