dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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