so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
