u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize