you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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