when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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