i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I supernannyed him into submission
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
