I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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