Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
