I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
