we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
