Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
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