laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize