ADVERTISEMENT

• (404): View more from Georgia

  In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.

  Fav 6 1101 2078

  share tweet
  

• (516): View more from New York

  onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?

  (443): View more from Maryland

  he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?

  Fav 134 13940 26668

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (208): View more from Idaho

  I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.

  Fav 11 1017 2677

  share tweet
  

• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.

  Fav 6 6004 1087

  share tweet
  

• (518): View more from New York

  Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!

  Fav 8 3768 1385

  share tweet
  

• (530): View more from California

  I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big

  Fav 8 1577 704

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (970): View more from Colorado

  I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.

  Fav 1 783 375

  share tweet
  

• (503): View more from Oregon

  There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now

  Fav 1 86 149

  share tweet
  

• (574): View more from Indiana

  She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.

  Fav 2 104 32

  share tweet
  

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online

  Fav 2 53 16

  share tweet
  

• (772): View more from Florida

  Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol

  Fav 0 9 36

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (704): View more from North Carolina

  i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?

  Fav 0 18 61

  share tweet
  

• (241): View more from

  I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever

  (509): View more from Washington

  You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.

  Fav 0 41 17

  share tweet
  

• (210): View more from Texas

  this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD

  Fav 0 59 10

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (256): View more from Alabama

  There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me

  Fav 0 44 32

  share tweet
  

Randomize