I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I smell like Dick and happiness
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
