It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I think people are normalizing furries
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
