i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
